Pop quiz, hotshot

This has been a long day, and tomorrow holds the promise of just as much length.
I’m having trouble thinking original thoughts, so I’m just going to follow the
lead of my geek friend MCF,
who recently administered
a pop quiz
on his blog.

1) They’re finally making the movie of your life and, after narrowing the
role of YOU down to three actors, they’ve asked for your choice. Who are the
three actors, and which person do you ultimately choose?

Patrick Harris
, John Francis
, and David
Hyde Pierce
. I would choose David Hyde Pierce.

2) You’re at a fancy
restaurant with your significant other, when your arch nemesis shows up with
his gang to rob the place. You left your costume home
tonight, and you wouldn’t want to reveal your true identity unless there
was no other choice. How do you handle this one?

If I had an arch nemesis, I would also have superspeed. There’s lots of things
you can do with superspeed. Or if I didn’t have superspeed, I would just start
telling my nemesis a story with no point and no real action, like the time
in nineteen-dickety-two (we had to say "dickety" back then because Hitler had
stolen "forty") when I was chasing the Kaiser and wearing an onion on my belt,
which was the style at the time…

3) 4 +X/8=15Y-23Z; solve for
each variable.


4) They’re turning my blog into a sitcom! Quick, who’s playing

Patton Oswalt.

5) What was the scariest moment of your life?

There have been a couple of times I feared imminent death, but I think the
fear when I saw the positive pregnancy test was more profound. Oddly, that
moment also ranks among my happiest.

6) After much thought and deliberation,
you realize the best thing you can do with your life is form your own team
of superheroes. Keeping in
mind that you don’t actually possess any powers or a dual identity in
this scenario,
how do you go about selecting your team, what abilities do you look
for in
potential allies, and what do you call your group?

I would select Mrs. Happy and Baby Happy. They’re not the most powerful heroes
in the world, but I’m not looking for the best fighters—I’m looking for the right fighters.

7) If a hypothetical
train is traveling East at 70 MPH, and a hypothetical truck is traveling
North at 55 MPH, then name 3 famous people you
feel shouldn’t be famous.

Paris Hilton, Ashlee Simpson, and Keanu Reeves.

8) A freak accident caused by lightning
or radiation or genetic engineering or whichever origin suits you, bestows
upon you the
ability to step
INSIDE your television set and interact with the characters.
Where do you go
first, and why?

If Firefly were
still on, I’d step in there because they need someone like me now since –spoiler

9) After winning a karaoke contest, you’re awarded
the grand prize from a local radio station: you get to perform ONE song
your favorite
group! Who
do you sing with and what song?

Barenaked Ladies, and I’d sing Enid.

10) A blogger you read regularly
posts a pop quiz. Do you take it? Please list your reasons either way.

I take the first one I notice, then ignore all the rest that follow. Unless
I have nothing better to do.

The quiz goes all the way up to 11.

Here lies the Mysterious Cloaked Figure, and why not.

7 thoughts on “Pop quiz, hotshot

  1. What is so funny about this is that in my mind I picture you looking exactly like David Hyde P. from Frazier.

  2. lol! This made me laugh…and yes, I too am on board with David Hyde Pierce. lol lol Just…um…with darker hair and a healthier complexion.

    So I guess that makes you…a young Tom Brokaw, only less Canadian?

    *hee hee*

  3. Mrs. Happy always thought I could’ve been on Frasier as another brother.

    My hair is darker, but my complexion is pretty pale.

  4. David Hyde-Pierce…yeah, yeah I can see that. :)

    By the way, it was “tickety” because the “Kaiser had taken our number 20″, unless you were paraphrasing or setting up a geek trap that I just tumbled into headlong. =)

  5. cadmus,
    I’d call us The Happy Hooligans.

    Have you no capacity for abstract thought? I was merging a couple of different Grampa stories and throwing Hitler in for atmosphere. And I’m pretty sure it was “dickety.”