You know those days where everything goes perfectly, where you can do nothing
wrong and even
make the world a better place? Me neither. I’m well acquainted with the opposite
sort of day, though. Sunday and Monday were both that sort of day for me. Some
things I (re)learned:
- If something can go wrong, it will.
- If there are a number of things that can go wrong, the thing that will
go wrong is the thing that will make you feel stupider than any of the other
possible wrong things.
- A church’s air conditioner will choose the first hot—and the most highly
attended—day of the year to stop working.
- If you sing in your church’s praise team and you know the words and bass
line for 49 of the group’s 50 songs, the one song you will be asked to sing
in front of the church is the one you don’t know.
- If you try to save money by buying an air conditioner (window unit) that
has been labeled "return," there will be something wrong with it
in spite of the stickers on the box proclaiming it fully intact and functional.
This is especially
- you have to carry the 63-pound (28.5kg) box up a flight of stairs.
- you make the purchase over the misgivings of your wife.
you will find when you get them home that they are for a different model
of air conditioner.
even completely forget how to spell faucet when called upon to do
the tub within three minutes.
food will taste nasty to her pregnancy-enhanced taste buds.
arrive at the movie fifteen minutes late instead of fifteen minutes early
due to bad information you got from a Web site.
feeling about two inches (5.08cm) tall.