What now?

"God’s timing is impeccable, isn’t it?" That’s what my pastor said
to me when I told him the news. Less than two weeks after losing my job, I
find out that a child will soon enter this world and depend on me for its every
need. One lesson I have had to learn repeatedly throughout my life is that
I control nothing and must therefore rely entirely on God the way a baby will
one day rely on me. If that’s what my pastor meant by "impeccable timing," he
was right. This is just about the strongest lesson in faith and trust that
God has ever given me. I just hope this time it sinks in.

So if all goes well, I’m
going to be a daddy. Right now I have a pregnant wife and no job. It seems
like that should upset me, but it doesn’t. I kind
of feel
like I should be more worried, but I’m not. I just can’t feel bad right
now. All I can do is look at my wife, who is more beautiful than ever, and
feel
more affection toward her than ever. I’m already surprised at my capacity
for unconditional love. Just knowing that my child is roughly the size of
a raspberry
is enough to inspire a desperate love. I’m praying over my baby, singing
to my baby, and crying over my baby even before my wife is showing any visible
signs of its existence. I fear that the actual, physical presence of this
tiny
human being in nine months or so will reduce me to a useless, quivering
pile of emotion.

Do I feel ready for this? No. But everyone tells me that no one ever feels
ready. I feel like a three-year-old with car keys—an excited three-year-old
with car keys. I don’t know the first thing about what I’m getting into, but
I’m pretty sure it’s going to be the funnest thing I’ve ever done.


I expected people to be excited about my announcement yesterday. I expected
to hear some congratulations and well wishes. I did not expect anyone to be
confused about the nature of the picture. I, personally, would never brush
my teeth with anything that had the words Pregnant and Not Pregnant printed
on it. I wonder about my friends/readers sometimes.

23 things I don’t understand

Marla once posted a list of
31
things she doesn’t understand
. Thirty-one is her special number. Mine is
23. So here are 23 things I don’t understand (no particular order):

  • heavy metal music
  • modern video games
  • why anyone would get married thinking, "If it doesn’t work out, I
    can always get a divorce."
  • how anyone can believe there is no God
  • how anyone can believe there is a God and still live as if He didn’t exist
  • how my wife can be so amazing so consistently
  • why she ever liked me to begin with
  • the book of Revelation
  • nearly every movie in the American
    Film Institute’s
    top ten
  • people who relish sex without love
  • people who confuse sex with love
  • Dune
  • the German language
  • the C++ programming language
  • pretty much any word coming from the mouth of Bernie Mac
  • Einstein’s theory of relativity
  • why some people consciously choose Windows XP over Mac OS X
  • why I sometimes take my marriage for granted
  • chess…and Risk…and any role-playing game
  • why we must all die a bit in order to grow
  • vegans
  • black holes and quantum physics
  • how my wife grows more beautiful every single day

Marriage links for the week

I had very little time today to find some marriage links, so if you know of
something good that I missed, please leave it in the comments.

Ben Wilson continues his examination of the book For Women Only with a discussion
of how
men view romance
. He quotes a man in the book: "The flip side of the [man's]
need for respect is horror at the idea of humiliation. I’d rather burn at the
stake.
That’s why a man won’t risk trying to be romantic. I’m risking humiliation if
I do it wrong."

Joe Missionary honors his wife on her birthday with a list of 30
words to describe her
.

Tony explains how being a family man can turn
one into an idiot
, but it’s
still important not to be a fool.

Bryan has a great idea for a meme: Blogs
that inspire me
. I’ll probably post
my own list some time in the near future.

His and Hers: Sitcom supporters

His and Hers is a weekly discussion of a question or topic relating
to marriage. On Friday, my wife and I each write our thoughts on the week’s
topic. I invite others to do the same with their spouses as an exercise in
celebrating marriage. This week’s question is our entry into MCF’s Blog Party:

Who are your three favorite supporting characters
in a sitcom?

Mrs. Happy’s response

Dewey, from Malcolm in the Middle, for his clueless innocence.

Stewie, from Family Guy, for his snide intellectualism.

Turk, from Scrubs, for his humor and loyalty.

Hmm… and these are qualities I happen to appreciate in Curt as
well. Fascinating.

Curt’s response

Hank Scorpio

He appeared on exactly one episode of The Simpsons, but he was
the perfect embodiment of the truism that nice does not mean good. He was
a diabolical James Bond villain bent on world domination as well as a gregarious
and benevolent CEO who genuinely cared about the welfare and morale of his
employees/henchmen. I also loved that dichotomy in Mayor Richard Wilkins III,
Harry Groener’s character
on Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Harry
"the Hat"

Harry Anderson played this con man who made an appearance on
a couple of episodes of Cheers. He helped the Cheers gang out of a
real tight spot or two, then robbed them blind and left them feeling good about
it.

Sideshow Bob

I didn’t want to use two characters from the same show, but I
can’t not include Kelsey Grammar’s stunning voice work and the delicious writing
that made Sideshow Bob one of the best comedic villains ever. Bob is a highly
intelligent, inherently dignified man trapped in the body of a bumbling clown. He wants
desperately to make the world a better place and is thwarted on all sides by
human stupidity and Bart. This drives him insane, and why wouldn’t it?

How I want to go

Okay, my brain is still a little mushy, but that’s not the only reason my posts
this week have been short and insubstantial. I’m trying to redesign this site
and move to a new content management system. It’s not as easy as I thought it
would be, and it’s taking up more time than I expected. Hopefully, I’ll have
complete the move some time next week. In the mean time, read this
love story
about a couple who were married for 65 years and left behind a
question of whether
death did them part or not.
I got the link from Miss
O’Hara
, who was absolutely right about my loving it.

If you’re prompted for a user name and password, you can get them here from
bugmenot.com.

Ugh

I’m not sure if it’s my uncertain future, my miserable cold, or
the
thirteen
episodes
of 24 Season
1 on DVD
that I’ve watched in the past two days, but something
seems to be
melting my brain and I can’t think of anything to write. I’m realizing anew just
how much my wife loves me and cherishes our marriage, though. That’s certainly something.

RLTB

My wife gave me a cold, so now I’m ill in addition to being unemployed. It’s
my fault, though. I guess I’d rather be sick for a couple of days than go an
hour without kissing her. Anyway, sickness trumps blogging today.

In the meantime, check out the two new poems on the Where We’re From page:
Where Shannon’s From and Where
Theresa’s From
.

Also, don’t miss the Challies
interview
with my geek friend Rey (of The
Bible Archive
). In it, he
sheds some light on why he’s the Christian blogger most likely to be accused
of heresy. He even gives a shout-out to The Happy Husband.

Marriage links for the week

The Rev. Donald Sensing of One Hand Clapping tells the
story of his wedding day
.
He offers one piece of advice: "If you ever get the chance not to be married
in a blizzard, take it."

Bowden McElroy is a licensed family counselor and author of the blog Notes. He
recently wrote several posts about marriage issues: Marriage
Counseling
, Pre-Marital
Counseling
, Marriage
Quiz
, and Commitment
in Marriage
.

John of Locusts and Honey offers some
advice
to Jeff and Amy, who have started a blog
chronicling the days leading
up to their wedding
.

Saument of the blog fides q ponders God’s
place in the bedroom
of a married
Christian couple.

The Detroit Free Press reports that a
happy marriage is good for your health
.

BBC News says that opposites rarely attract, and common
ground is essential
to success in marriage.